The results are in...

Well I got the call yesterday and I am not pregnant. I'll start by saying I guess I am not that surprised because of the five embryos thawed on the last transfer, only one survived and it was a "C" quality. That was the one we implanted. I was really wishing and hoping for a miracle.

Now that this is done though, I have to say, I am bummed on so many levels. This is the end of my journey with these IP's. They only had 11 embryos to start and they are not going to go through the whole process again. Their attitude from the start was "Whatever is meant to be will be." I guess that is a good way to look at life. I have learned a lot from them and really grown close to them. I know certain people are put in our lives for a reason and I am thankful to have gone through this journey with them. They are wonderful parents already and hopefully I'll still get updates from time to time.

I will go for a "re-match" and post more on that journey to come. All I have to say is the next IP's have a tough act to follow. I hope we have a different outcome next time. What can I say...whatever is meant to be, will be.

To do List-Part II

Ok, so I finished my previous to do list. The next one was a little more difficult. At the top of that list was Learn to give self injections...YIKES! The injections have been a bit of a sore subject for me, excuse the pun. Although I have tried, for some reason my hands don't listen to my brain when it comes to causing bodily harm to my self. (I guess that is a good thing?) I was determined to get this checked off my list before I went to LA so the night before I left I went to work. I tried standing, lying down, and sitting. It turns out there is no "good" position to inject yourself in the rump. I had to have a pep talk inside my head. I felt like a football coach..."You can do this...Don't be a baby...etc..." Finally my strong will paid off. I was able to coach my hands to do what my brain didn't want them to do. If I can do that, I can do anything! Right?

So I kissed my sweet boys and my hunny goodbye and went out into the big world. My hubby told me to go ahead and get prego with another man's baby and to have some fun too...What a comedian.

So the list goes on...

9am Have a delicious breakfast-Check

10:30 am Embryo Transfer-Check

Now comes the fun part...bed rest. I can still remember the days telling my parents, "I'm bored." "I'm not tired." "There's nothing to do." etc... Look how far I've come. I have nowhere to be, nothing to do, and I have to stay in bed. I love it!

D (intended parent) has brought me lunch, cupcakes not once, but twice today, along with 3 pints of REAL ice cream (no low fat about this stuff). So sweet! (excuse the pun) I guess if I have trouble sleeping, I could just lay there in a self induced sugar coma. This is the life, eh?

Now we keep our fingers crossed for the next 10 days until we get our positive pregnancy test...

To Do Lists

I am preparing to go to LA for our second embryo transfer in the next few days. This time around my hubby won't be joining me with duty calls for work. :( So anyway, I have been going along and busily making my to do list and checking it twice, (for those who don't know, I love lists). I've been packing, doing laundry, cleaning, painting my toes, etc... (you see why I need the list) for the big day (part II) when I had the thought, "I don't think I have ever traveled with out my hubby!" I know it's not that big of a deal for all those seasoned travelers, but I have to admit I'm feelin' a bit nervous. I'm such a home-body!

So I decided to make a mental list of reasons my hubby should come with me. I spoke to him last night and he just gave me a big hug and said "I think this will be really good for you." He reminded me of all the day to day "stuff" that goes along with being a stay at home Mom. The cooking, cleaning, fighting kids, whining kids etc...He didn't get very far in his list of reasons I will love some time alone when I had an epiphany...It's going to be great! Yes it will be different and I will miss him and my boys...but I am really excited to go. I get to have adult conversation, spend time with my IP's, not to mention some R &R. When was the last time some one said you have to stay in bed for a few days? I am really feeling good about this. I guess I can cross "convince Jeremy to blow off work and go with me" off my list...Wish me luck!!!

Happy "Surro-Mamma's" Day!

Just had to give a quick shout out to all my Surro-Mammas out there. As if being a Mom isn't enough, a select few Moms have decided to help complete other families. It is truly a labor of love. Enjoy your day Surro-Mammas, you deserve it! I can't wait to join the club...my transfer date is quickly approaching.

Part 2 is a go!

Just thought I would update...I have been sooo bad about it lately!!! There has not really been a whole lot on the baby makin' front so it's been off my radar. Things are finally just starting to get going again though, so here it goes... I got the go ahead about a month ago to begin meds again, but when I stated thinking about dates I realized that an April transfer meant a Christmas time delivery. Yikes! I am so glad I checked that out! I talked with my IP's and we all agreed that we would wait until May. So, I got my new calender and it looks like we will be doing the transfer the last week in May. Something about a spring time transfer just feels right. Anyway, I am totally ready for everything (with the exception of injections) and I think everything will work out just as it should. Here we go!

On the bright side...

I got the official news and unfortunately it was negative. I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little bummed because I went in to this with such high expectations for the first round. When you stop to think about it though, as a surrogate you have to go into this process with high expectations. You have to believe it will happen on the first try and that everything will work out just as it should. There is definitely truth to the power of positive thinking. With that said, I am determined to have a positive outlook on this.

So in the spirit of looking on the bright side...
I get a break from the injections...woohoo! My poor bruised rump is in desperate need of a break.
I get to soak in the hot tub in the evenings.
I get to take scalding baths instead of showers.
Oh, and let's not forget that by having a later due date, I won't be as big as a house all Summer long...I may even be able to paint my own toes. =)

I know these are small things, but hey, it's those little things in life that makes me smile.

Anyway, I am not going to worry about it anymore because I know it will happen next time around...

The Big Day!

I'm going to keep this short and sweet. My Hubby and I went down to LA and had a great time with one of the IP's. The other couldn't make it...busy bringin' home the bacon. We did miss him, but never the less, we got some quality time all together. We did the Transfer of two frozen embryos on Thursday (2/4) and I am very optimistic. The whole experience was quite surreal... and surprisingly fast! I don't even think the natural way is as quick as IVF ;). So, as I said, I'm feelin' good about the whole thing. I go in for my test this weekend, if I can find a place open, and I'll post more then...
Oh, and I'm sending some peace, love and positive pregnancy tests to all the other February transfers! Good Luck!